sex in the city, sex on the city, sex over the city...

I just realized that it's been about two months since I've posted an updated, and I kind of feel bad. I'd gotten busy with college, job interviews, and now with my parents' marriage and me getting caught in it. At any rate, I plan on trying to post an update once a week from now on, with whatever topic that comes to mind.

So, just recently the Sex and the City movie came out. I'll be quite frank: I never liked the series. I suppose it's something I might've better understood if I were 30-something, single and successful.

Though I haven't watched the series enough to pass better judgement, from what episodes I'd seen, I thought it was a superficial show that disguised itself as a commentary on modern women and their sexual plights. I have no intention of seeing it's big screen counterpart either, but I've already read and heard about its plot from the Internet and various people.

If I'm going to explain why I really dislike this series, and consequently its movie, I think I can sum it up simply by the fact that, like in every other series in the media that represents women, it doesn't really represent what women should aim for, rather what she should aim for to be with a man. Take the main character Carrie, for example. She's beautiful, a fashionista, and is successful. By our standards, she is an alpha female. Yet in the entire series and in the movie, the happiness and confidence she feels is completely overshadowed by her on again and off again boyfriend, Big, who is commitment-phobic.

Do you know what I'd tell Carrie? I wouldn't encourage her to continue to go after a guy who wants the milk but not the cow. I'd tell her to drop him, and find a new guy that is neither Big nor that furniture guy she dates some of the series. Why should she feel the need to pursue a man? A woman does not pursue men. She pursues her own happiness. Let a man come to you. If he doesn't want to, so what? It's his loss. Gain confidence in yourself first, and don't let your opinion about yourself be shaped by a guy.

But instead of the show portraying this idea towards its target market of 30-something women, it just continues to tell them that pursuing the commitment-phobic guy who really isn't into you at all but is in it for the prolonged sex should be the ultimate goal. All the while, this thoroughly-traditional portrayal is masked by the modernness of talking openly about your sex life and being pretty.

I don't condone the pursuit of satisfying sex or the pursuit of a good love life. I condone the continuous oppression of women by forcing her the idea that she should be fetching a man in order to feel that life is perfectly complete. If she feels this on her own, then okay. But girls should work on themselves, first and foremost, and not work on themselves to please men or other girls.

So, I hope the next woman-centered series that becomes successful can deal with issues like this a bit more upfront without the need to hide behind sex.